J.D.:
[while peeing in the bushes outside some house accidentally saw Janitor taking a shower] Look, uh... Janitor ...I’m gonna be straight with you. I saw your penis, and I noticed a possible melanoma that you should really have checked out.
Janitor:
When did you see my penis?
J.D.:
Last night, when you were showering.
Janitor:
Where were you?
J.D.:
Oh, I was outside, in the bushes.
Janitor:
Uhhh...
J.D.:
Look, it was just a coincidence, man - I mean, i-i-if you had looked out the window, you’d have seen my penis, you know!
Janitor:
What? Why?
J.D.:
Because I had it out while I was looking at yours!
Elliot Reid:
My life is a mess!
J.D.:
At least you’re pretty.
Elliot Reid:
Yeah, well, pretty don’t pay the rent!
Carla Espinosa:
It does for my sister.
Elliot Reid:
Oh, my God, your sister’s a prostitute?
Carla Espinosa:
She’s a model. Come on, Elliot, we talked about thinking before we speak.
Carla Espinosa:
[about a male intern] You’re right; he definitely has a cute little butt.
Elliot Reid:
It’s almost like it’s been sculpted.
J.D.:
Who cares? Everyone has a cute butt; I have a cute butt.
Carla Espinosa:
You should bring it in someday.
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