Roseanne

Roseanne tries her hand at telephone solicitation while trying to console Becky, who had an embarrassing accident in front of the school council. Just as her speech was wrapping up, she broke wind. The whole school is talking about it, especially Darlene. Becky is mortified, and Roseanne’s attempts to comfort her fail... that is, until Jimmy (Stephen Dorff) arrives at the Conner home.

Jackie takes umbrage at Roseanne’s remarks about her career ambitions when she reveals that she has enrolled in police academy; Becky gets caught reading Dan’s girlie magazine; and Darlene commiserates with a drunken Jackie about her frustrations over being the little sister.

Roseanne gets her hopes up when she is referred by a friend for an office job that would allow her to quit the telemarketing job that she hates. After a quick interview, she lands the job--But the celebration is short lived, when the offer is revoked due to her lack of computer knowledge.

Bert (Kevin Dunn), an emotionally needy architect at Dan’s new job site adopts the Conners as a surrogate family, much to their terror.

Roseanne begins to feel abandoned when Jackie leaves for the police academy for six weeks. When Becky starts to date a 17-year-old, and Darlene goes to her first co-ed party with her, Roseanne feels left out. After attempting to hang out with everyone, she just settles into being alone.

A poker night becomes interesting when Roseanne receives a kiss from Dan’s friend Arnie. Roseanne speaks to Jackie about the kiss and she later finds out it was just a friendly kiss.

The Conners celebrate Halloween. Roseanne and Dan compete to see who is the spookiest, while Roseanne tries to rekindle the spirit of Halloween to Becky.

Roseanne tries to get a few minutes of relaxation in the bathtub despite constant interruptions from her family, and ends up having a dream about murdering her husband and kids. The dream ends with Roseanne on trial, her family back from the dead to testify on her behalf, and a lavish musical number.

On Thanksgiving Day, Jackie finally spills the news of her new job to her mother. The two of them end up the main event in a series of bickering and snickering that flows through the holiday feast. After everone is finished eating, and complaining about everyone else, Dan gets a huge shock, when he finds his father is romancing Crystal.

Darlene writes a poem in class that wins teacher recognition, and is asked to read it at an assembly in front of the parents and student body. Roseanne is so pleased that Darlene can write, and she is excited to go to the assembly. Darlene chooses not to go, opting to spend the evening at home with Dan, watching the game. Roseanne puts her foot down, and they go to the assembly, where Darlene strikes an emotional chord with all.

Roseanne gets a second job at the Lobo Lounge, but soon discovers that she and Dan are spending too much time apart.

Becky and Roseanne are engaged in a particularly nasty string of fights, and Becky begins giving her mother the silent treatment, prompting Roseanne to remove the door to Becky’s room to force Becky to open up to her.

Roseanne’s new job at a fast-food place includes an obnoxious teenage boss. When she invites him to dinner to try to butter him up, his nasty attitude soon convinces everyone that Roseanne deserves to be treated better. Glenn Shadix guest-stars as an indecisive customer.

Dan and Roseanne aren’t home, but Becky is in charge. She invites her friend Dana over to do homework, and soon they need a break, and a drink from the Conner bar. Becky whips up a few ’Tornadoes’ and the girls get drunk. A hung-over Becky is left to explain herself when Dana’s mother comes asking questions the following day.

Jackie steps in as substitute mom when Roseanne has to go to Moline when their father breaks his leg. She dazzles Dan with her housekeeping skills out of a 1950’s family sitcom. Jackie is surprised to learn what Dan really thinks of her and that he remembers the first time they met.

The Conners’ old biker pal Ziggy (Jay O. Sanders) roars into town, making them feel old, fat, and trapped. In the end, they realize that while their lives are not what they had planned, they still feel fulfillment.

Crystal recommends Roseanne for a job at the beauty shop that she frequents, doing the same tasks that she does at home for free. Roseanne is hesitant, but once interviewed, is persuaded into the position by the shop owner. After a short time on the job, she is given a raise, and more responsibility.

Roseanne and Dan get to the point of no return when they realize they need to lose some weight. Roseanne takes charge and makes a point to put strict restrictions on what the two should and should not eat, but it’s she who has the most trouble adapting.

Jackie has finally found ’the one,’ but can the relationship withstand Roseanne’s meddling?

Jackie gives Roseanne the silent treatment when she has enough of her meddling in her love life, but the sisters reconcile. Gary proposes to Jackie on a whim, and Roseanne goes into overdrive with wedding preparations, but Gary and Jackie soon realize they’re not ready for marriage. As the ending credits roll there are photographs of the wedding of Prince Charles and Diana Princess of Wales.

Roseanne is rear-ended by Mrs. Wellman and must rest for awhile, and without any apology from Mrs. Wellman, Roseanne considers suing her.

It’s tax season and Roseanne and Dan are contemplating how they can make the process easier. Dan stresses out as he cannot figure how to fill out the tax document. Roseanne tries her hand at the package but ends up traveling to the IRS office with Dan.

In an attempt to bond with their daughters, Dan goes clothes shopping with Becky, and Roseanne watches basketball with Darlene.

Roseanne, although only turning 37, feels like she’s hit the end of the road in her life. Always wanting to be a writer, Roseanne wishes this Birthday that she had more time to jot down her thoughts. Dan and the kids surprise Roseanne with her own small writing studio. But just when she finally has time to write, Roseanne is hit with a severe case of writer’s block.