Married with Children

To scare a woman into having sex with him, Bud simulates a tornado – which turns all too real when an actual tornado is headed for Chicago. Marcy takes up as their leader and the Bundys and D’Arcys move into the Bundy house basement. Kelly goes out to look for Lucky.

Al and Griff blackmail Gary, because of a bad promotion contest, when they find the shoes from the shoe store are made by children in sweatshops. They rope in Jefferson and Bud’s help. Meanwhile, Peggy wins a microwave and recruits Kelly to help her hide it from Al.

Al and Jefferson watching COPS when an all-too-familiar theme song comes on. Jefferson asks Al, "Can you believe that show’s still on the air?" Al thinks it’s a classic, but doesn’t like the stupid neighbors. In the meantime, Kelly must abstain from sex to get a part as a nun in a commercial for extra extra virgin olive oil, while Al poses as a police officer and appears with Officer Dan on the TV show COPS and answers a call without him to 9766 Jeopardy Lane, where a burglary is in progress at the D’Arcy residence.

Al’s Dodge starts sputtering so he sends the rest of the family to find a fuel pump for it. In a flashback to the early 1970s where Al reminisces about how the Dodge has always been a part of the family, his talk with his father, the night Kelly was conceived, he remembers an incident where a Japanese car cuts them off and he has to slam on the brakes to avoid hitting it, and a young Kelly, who always has her head in a book and has learned things that her parents have no clue about, hits her head and suddenly becomes an airhead. Peg suggests that Kelly give baby Bud one of her rubber dollies to play with, which neither Peg nor Al thinks will be a negative influence on him in the future.

Al buries the Dodge in the backyard and has a funeral for it (complete with his buddy Ike playing the bagpipes) and leases a new sports car, the Testica 2000, which turns out to be a lemon. Meanwhile, Peg, Kelly and Bud dig up the Dodge so they can sell the engine to a collector for $10,000, but ex-CIA operative Jefferson makes a quick trip to Cuba to ask a favor of his old nemesis, Fidel Castro: since there are so many old cars there due to the trade embargo, maybe one of them has a fuel pump that might fit in the Dodge.

When Jefferson cannot find a turkey for Marcy to cook, Bud, Jefferson, and Peg go after Kelly’s pet turkey so they can kill it and cook it for Thanksgiving. Trying to save Hank, the turkey, by throwing it out of the window so that it flies away, it dies and becomes their dinner. Meanwhile, Al and Griff go to a black neighborhood to find Al’s favorite pie maker and end up in her funeral. He steals the pie from the funeral.

Peg wants to go to Branson, Missouri, and the Bundys end up there with no money by chaining their car to the bus. The prize for the local talent contest is $500, so Peg and Kelly enter as a singing duo called "The Juggs", and turn out to be talented enough to win not only the money, but a gig touring with Tammy Wynette for a year – until they all manage to screw it up and she fires them. Meanwhile, Jefferson and Marcy agree to feed Lucky while the Bundys are gone and start feeling a little amorous, but they can’t decide on what bedroom game to play. They try a new one: they dress up as Al and Peg and do a little role-playing, which leads to a hot time in Al’s and Peg’s bedroom.

Gary hires two young boys to help out Al and Griff for the Christmas sale. They take advantage of them and make them do all the work. When the boys are trained, Gary fires Al and Griff and they end up taking menial jobs at the mall. When the new boys leave, Al and Griff get their jobs back. To win the decoration competition, Marcy gets life-sized Virgin Mary and Joseph statues, which gets kidnapped by Kelly and Bud. When they try to get a ransom from the D’arcys, it goes horribly wrong. Peg gets into making ginger bread and bakes the entire neighbourhood, which gets her the first prize in the decorating contest.

On his birthday, when Al insults fat women on the way to the Jiggly Room, he is put on trial in the shoe store by a group of fat women who accuse him of being prejudiced against the obese. Meanwhile, Bud and Kelly attempt to tint the Dodge’s windows as a birthday present to Al. Peg bakes him a cake and eats it.

Peggy slips on a candy bar wrapper and hits her head on the table, giving her amnesia. With no memory of how she used to be, Al brainwashes Peg into acting like the perfect housewife. Even when Marcy tries to tell her the truth, Peg doesn’t believe her. When they are trying to have sex, her memory comes back and makes him have sex again as a punishment.

Al tells Bud to lower his standards in finding women when he can’t get a date. Al and Griff take off to avoid explaining to Gary why the sales have dropped 500% and still they are asking for a break room. Bud stops by and Gary finds him attractive. Al, Peg and Kelly later catch Gary trying to sneak out of Bud’s room, much to Al’s horror. But all is OK when she decides to build them a break room at the shoe store and install a big-screen TV and a refrigerator stocked with beer. But after a while, Bud doesn’t like being treated, as a piece of meat that exists only to satisfy Gary’s carnal desires.

Kelly takes an improvement class and Al takes advantage of her by asking her to act{work} like him. Bud asks Al to repair the basement after Al starts charging him rent. When Al refuses, Bud calls a health inspector who makes Al live in the basement after it is deemed uninhabitable. Bud then gets Marcy, Kelly and Peg to torture him so that he repairs the basement.

Seeking regular meals, Al and Griff join the Army using Jefferson’s help. Marcy makes Kelly and Bud pick up all the garbage they threw into her yard. After training, Al and Griff ends up cleaning up due to garbage strike with Jefferson as their leader.

Bud gets Kelly a new acting gig, where she has to compete with Heather, her nemesis. They end up challenging each other to a boxing match. After a lot of training she beats Heather. When Al-Peggy loose badly in a "Know Your Spouse Board Game" against Marcy-Jefferson and Griff-His girlfriend, they decide to see a marriage counselor on Marcy-Jefferson’s suggestion. They fight and break up.

Al moves out of the house and into an apartment near an airport. He invites Griff & Jefferson over and celebrates. Peg is heart-broken and the kids try to cheer her up. Marcy & the rest of the neighborhood celebrates with fireworks and parade. The girls and the guys go to the same bar to pick-up guys/girls. Peg ends up finding herself a man, who the kids love.

Al keeps striking out with women. Bud and Kelly break up Peg and her new boyfriend after discovering that he’ll put the entire family to work. Peg admits that she misses Al and goes to meet him. They go out together and make-up.

Peggy poses as The Jiggly Room’s stripper in the talent search to trick Al and wins. But she has to keep her identity a secret because Al loves Peggy’s stripper persona more than herself. Bud forces Kelly to gain weight for a weight-loss commercial, which goes all to her ass.

Kelly takes over for a surly kids’ show host after the real host goes insane on the sets. She entertains the kids with a puppet that looks like Bud. She belittles all the other characters in the show and fires Bud. Finally Bud gets her fired by getting the old host back. Meanwhile, Al and Peg experiment with sleeping in separate beds; first twin beds and then bunk beds.

Al cuts off Peggy from shopping. Jefferson is very insecure about his looks and turns to Peggy for help. Peggy hooks him to shopping. When Marcy objects, he gets a job as exercise coach, where all the girls ogle him. Marcy forces him to resign. Bud directs a commercial for Gary Shoes with Kelly and Al. After a bad performance, Griff replaces Al and Al tries to sabotage the shoot.

Marcy’s cousin, Mandy comes to town and befriends Al. Marcy being very jealous of her cousin asks Al to keep her away from Jefferson. Later Mandy reveals that she is a Lesbian to Al and then to Marcy, which makes her very angry. Al manages to console Marcy into accepting Mandy.

Al makes a pact with The Devil to play with the Chicago Bears to take them to Super Bowl in exchange for his soul. When Al insists on not quitting after his aim is achieved, The Devil sends him to hell, where he meets his entire family who is now dead. As his life is exactly as in earth, he challenges The Devil to a football match for returning to earth.

Al and Griff turn the shoe store into a barter shop, after Gary leaves, so they can get massage chairs. Finally they are forced to reverse their work when Gary returns. Meanwhile, Kelly takes massage lessons and tests them out on Bud, which goes horribly wrong.

Bud’s pen-pal from prison and her boyfriend pay a visit to the Bundy household and take the family hostage. Marcy and Jefferson dress up for a cruise and visit the Bundys to rub it in. Kelly ends up falling in love with the prisoner’s boyfriend, Lonnie. Meanwhile, Al and Griff plan to watch a pay-per-view 3D movie at home but ends up as hostage too.

After Lonnie is released from jail, he proposes to Kelly. When Al realizes that Lonnie is son of the Tots, he agrees. With hours before Kelly’s wedding, Al learns that Kelly’s new beau is lusting for other women. He is in a dilemma, but finally ends up breaking the wedding.