The Cosby Show

Denise surprises Cliff and Clair by returning home a week early from Africa. But even more surprising – she brings with her a new husband, naval officer Martin Kendall, and his 3-year-old daughter, Olivia. In typical Denise style, she not only neglected to tell her parents about her marriage, she never even told them about Martin’s existence! And it does not take Cliff long to figure out where the newlyweds will be living until Martin’s naval housing is approved – the Huxtable Inn, of course.

Cliff’s story about how he and his roommates cleaned their floors in college inspires Theo and his buddies to strap soapy sponges to their butts and slide across the kitchen floor. Unfortunately, their landlord (who lives directly beneath them) is not amused by their ingenuity – he is too busy cleaning up the water damage! Theo and his friends are evicted, spurring Cliff into immediate action to have them reinstated (lest Theo be forced to return to the Huxtable’s already overflowing abode).

Vanessa and her girlfriends are asking for trouble when they play the alphabet game with a bottle of Scotch. Vanessa chug-a-lugs her way to a miserable night of sickness and through a nasty hangover the next day. But Cliff and Clair decide to hammer the lesson home even further. They devise an alphabet game of their own that includes Rudy, four shot glasses, a bottle of booze and a confused and extremely reluctant Vanessa.

Denise and Martin visit the Rhode Island naval base where they are expecting to be housed. There is just one little hitch: Denise has neglected to confirm the reservation for the housing. And although the Navy puts the Kendalls on a waiting list, for the next six months they will have to stay right where they are – in Cliff and Clair’s overcrowded home! Meanwhile, Cliff’s desperate attempts to explain what he does for a living to Olivia meet with her polite but firm rebuttal: "Doctors don’t deliver babies," she informs him, "the stork does!"

Theo proudly answers all of Cliff’s questions as Theo practices for an upcoming mythology exam. But when he scores low on a test where he knew all the answers but could not always understand the questions, Cliff and Clair take him to a learning specialist, who tells them that Theo has dyslexia. And although Theo’s diagnosed condition is manageable, his and Vanessa’s litany of accusations (about Theo’s years of suffering parental criticism for laziness and bad study habits) proves to be unbearable for Cliff and Clair.

Sondra and Elvin get a well-deserved night out when an overconfident Denise boasts that caring for two children should be as easy as looking after one. So the marathon begins! It is Denise and Olivia versus Winnie and Nelson. And after a long evening of twin mayhem, complicated by a recurring local blackout, the exhausted competitors wind up on the Huxtables’ doorstep. Cliff and Clair wisely retreat to the basement for a good night’s sleep.

Even after raising three daughters, Cliff’s in over his head when Rudy reports her first "boy trouble." Clarence, the boy she likes, likes her. But his friends taunt him about it, so he treats Rudy badly to quiet them. Clarence and Rudy’s relationship quickly deteriorates from a love match to teasing, name-calling and a knock-down, drag-out fight. Cliff tries to give Rudy his facts-of-life speech (the one about boys being like helicopters and girls being like geraniums). But at the school dance, the wise Mrs. McGee pairs Rudy and Clarence and they mend fences all on their own!

Cliff’s ingestion of a sausage hero immediately before bedtime brings on a dream in which spores contaminate the US. water supply (except in New Jersey) and impregnate thousands of men, including Cliff, Elvin and Martin. Theo, the only unwed mother-to-be, soon joins them. They commiserate and console each other, but their solace is short-lived. Contractions send them all to the hospital and into the most bizarre delivery room scene in television history!

When Martin’s ex-wife Paula (Victoria Rowell) calls Olivia from the airport after her departure is delayed, Denise impulsively invites the woman she has never met to join the Huxtables for Thanksgiving dinner. Amid the spying of curious family members and acute nervousness from Martin, Denise gets a chance to have an enlightening conversation with the woman whose child she is raising, and with whom she has more than a little in common! In the meantime, Clair keeps sending Cliff out into the rain for last-minute Thanksgiving groceries.

Chocoholics Cliff and Olivia do a hatchet job on the cake that Clair’s baked for Denise’s in-laws (Moses Gunn and Nancy Wilson), extracting a large circle from its middle. The two culprits quickly cover up their defacement of the dessert but to no avail – Clair discovers the icing over the hole they have stuffed with paper towels! Meanwhile, Denise frets over her upcoming meeting with the woman who has reportedly said to Martin about Denise, "I can’t stand her." When Clair asks Lorraine, Martin’s mother, to clarify the remark, it becomes clear that Martin’s the culprit here. And it is three against one when Denise, Clair and Lorraine give Martin a hard time for being so hard of hearing!

Clair’s in Washington on a case and Cliff’s in charge – but just barely. Rudy follows Cliff’s advice on how to deal with her on-again, off-again friends – only to succeed in alienating all of them. Even when Cliff gets himself into trouble with Rudy’s teacher for ghost-writing Rudy’s history composition, he remains determined to handle the household on his own. But when Vanessa pulls the wool almost far enough over Cliff’s eyes to get away with going to a college party, Clair is the only one who can inform Cliff that he’s been duped!

Martin and Cliff spend some time together and develop a new, warm appreciation for each other. When Cliff confesses his secret regret about not having given Denise away at her wedding, Martin stages an informal ceremony in the Huxtable living room, so Cliff can see his wish come true. Elsewhere, Elvin slowly warms up to his elf s makeup and costume for a Christmas show at the hospital. And Denise tries to explain what Santa Claus looks like to a suspicious and highly skeptical Olivia, who counters with "If Santa Claus has a little bit of everyone inside him, is that why he’s so fat?"

Sondra decides to stay home to work on her law school application, happily forfeiting a chance to go out to dinner with Elvin, his old college chum Judy and Judy’s sister. Elvin gallantly offers to stay home with Sondra, but she insists that he go. However, when he pays for her dinner, Sondra’s so miffed, she refuses to speak to him! Later, Cliff explains the workings of a woman’s mind to his son-in-law: Elvin is supposed to be psychic, of course – when Sondra said "go," she really meant "stay" and when she said "yes," she really meant "no!" Meanwhile, Sondra, who expects Clair to side with her after hearing the whole story, get a shocking surprise when Clair tells her she’s just as much to blame for the whole situation as Elvin and probably even more because she wasn’t honest with him or herself to begin with!

Cliff’s late-night eating habits finally bite back, with a vengeance! His nightmare is filled with such Muppet characters as overstuffed talking sandwiches, back-talking refrigerator denizens and a bloodthirsty mob of creatures in the operating theater of Cliff’s hospital. It seems that Cliff is scheduled to perform a delicate operation for their viewing pleasure, but he somehow winds up on the table as the patient, before waking up safe and sound in his own bed.

When Denise’s snappy repartee gives Vanessa the courage to approach handsome Elliott in a cafe, all looks promising. But later on, as Denise envisions a career as a single’s counselor, Vanessa storms in to announce that Denise has ruined her life: Elliott already has a girlfriend named Shana! Elliott, a weakling who is attached to Shana but smitten with Vanessa, then shows up to ask Dr. Denise for her advice on how to handle the situation. Big mistake! Finally, Shana (Malinda Williams) arrives to give Denise a piece of her mind. At that point, Denise decides it is time for her to permanently retire from the love business!

Will cultures and tastes clash? Denise plans a healthful, fully organic menu for Olivia’s birthday party. Cliff and Clair contend that kids expect chocolate cake and junk food – and will not settle for less. So they agree to offer the children both kinds of food and monitor which cake the kids actually prefer! During the day, Cliff is pressed into child-sitting and it takes all his ingenuity to keep the party going in light of such comments as "I’ve had matzos that tastes better than this!"

Elvin and Theo catch blues great Riley Jackson (B.B. King) at a local club and Theo is blown away by his singing. Coincidentally, the next day, Jackson is at the Huxtable house when Theo drops by to rave about his "discovery" of this great singer. It seems that Jackson is an old friend of Grandpa Russell’s and he has invited the whole Huxtable family to hear him play that night. Everyone but the jaded, world-weary Vanessa (who has grown sick and tired of the blues) is excited about the concert. But with the first few notes of "Baby, You Done Lost Your Good Thing Now," Vanessa’s on her feet, begging for more!

Eagerness to purchase a T-shirt that lights up overshadows better judgment when Rudy "borrows" $2.30 from the money Clair’s left on the counter to pay the dry cleaning bill. Rudy’s attempts to replace the money before Clair finds it missing lead her further into misery and duplicity. Cliff finally adds it all up and pulls Rudy aside for a heart-to-heart talk. It yields some truths for both of them. Rudy realizes that she was wrong and must confess to Clair. And Cliff learns why Rudy was afraid to ask him for the money (she was afraid she would be subjected to his litany about the salary of coal miners in 1919)!

Rudy’s down in the dumps because she has been partnered with the best male dancer in school for an upcoming show. Cliff and Clair intensify her tap dancing lessons in an effort to boost her confidence for the big day. But it is Cliff who is most inspired. Overconfident to the max, he pulls on a pair of taps and faces off against Rudy’s teacher, the legendary Sandman Sims. The tapstepping marathon leaves Cliff beaten and bowed. Rudy, on the other hand, more than holds her own on the big night and shines beside her formidable partner.

Theo throws Cliff, Elvin, and Martin a challenge they cannot ignore: prove that they are not living in "the marriage graveyard" (where Theo claims romances go to die)! Cliff devises a secret competition that will not only resurrect the romance in their lives but will determine which of the husbands is the most romantic. According to his plan, the reactions of their wives to some specially selected presents will be the barometer for determining "The Emperor of Romance.” But Olivia spills the beans to the women just before the big event, leaving the three wives to plot sweet revenge for being used as pawns in their husbands’ macho game.

Theo and Justine take a big step without telling either set of parents, and it all comes out, literally, in the wash. When Cliff finds Justine’s undergarments in Theo’s wash load, Theo comes clean and admits that he and Justine have been living together ever since her roommate moved out. When Cliff and Clair refuse to support him unless he returns to his own apartment, Theo takes a bold and defiant stand. But level-headed Justine brings reality back into focus for Theo, and together they make a wise decision for their future.

Exhausted, overworked and with patience worn thin, Clair wonders if she has "anything left to give." Cliff insists that she get away for a few days and sends her off to a secluded cabin in the woods for some rest and relaxation. But the hideaway is hideous: drafty, cold and barely functional! Clair longs to come home to the relative comfort of noise and chaos in the Huxtable house.

Vanessa and her girlfriends display extraordinarily bad judgment when they lie and deceive their way into borrowing a car and making a trip to Baltimore to see a rock concert behind their parents’ backs. The journey is disastrous: the car is stolen, a con artist cons them out of their concert tickets and a pickpocket takes all their travel money. But all pales in comparison to the reception that awaits Vanessa upon her return home – Hurricane Clair strikes with all the fury of a mother scorned! Meanwhile, Olivia tries to impress Cliff with some jokes.

Clair brings her friend and rival attorney, Bernice (Mercedes Ruehl), home to visit while Cliff’s entertaining their recently divorced neighbor, Jeffrey. Despite their physical disparity, Jeffrey and Bernice really hit it off. But Jeffrey is so self-conscious about his new toupee, he cannot concentrate on Bernice and blows what Cliff and Clair hoped might be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Denise applies to a local college, only to be told that with her Hillman credits will not be accepted. She will have to enter as a freshman and need a tutor. She bemoans the fact that they will not give her credit for her "life experiences" – such as marriage and living at home with her parents. Always on the lookout for a shortcut to success, Denise is enthused when she hears Olivia’s teacher using rap music to teach the children to count. But she is deflated again when she volunteers to become the teacher’s apprentice and is turned down because she is without a college degree.

Olivia cannot understand why she must go to church when God obviously wants her to go to the zoo with her friend. But after spending some time with Cliff’s visiting great aunt Gramtee (Minnie Gentry), Olivia decides that she would rather take part in the family’s togetherness in church the next day. Mavis Staples leads the choir and church in a rousing song.